June 11, 2010

World Cup 2010 for Dummies - Part X - And GO!



And they're off......! Since I'm a bit behind, today a condensed version encompassing Groups F and G. First games of Group F: Monday, June 14th and Group G on Tuesday.

Group F: PINS
Paraguay
Italy
New Zealand
Slovakia

Paraguay: Have no idea who plays on this team. But they're from South America ie born with a ball. Ok, with two, but you know what I mean. A FOOTball. FIFA Ranking: 31

Italy: "Yes, we have old players but with age comes charisma and the experience of playing in big games. " says Marcello Lippi, the coach. 'Course he has to say that....sheesh. I like the definition of "old" in football. The captain, Fabio Cannavaro, is, like, 36! He's ancient. Kidding. I think he's cute. Is the head butter Matterazzi, playing? Oh, and Italy won the last World Cup in 2006 against La France. FIFA Ranking: 5

New Zealand: "Striker Rory Fallon has said heavy security is preventing teams getting close to the locals and tarnishing the team's World Cup experience." Yeah, since that'll be the only thing they get out of this tournament, I reckon. FIFA Ranking: 78

Slovakia: This is Slovakia's first ever appearance in a major championship. Edu Alert! Geography/history lesson: as you may know, Slovakia used to be a part of Czechoslovakia. The velvet divorce took place in 1993, when one small country became two tiny countries. Its so nice when separations go well. FIFA Ranking: 34

Group G: BPPC
Brazil
Portugal
People's Republic of Korea (yeah, the Communist Korea)
Cote d"Ivoire

Brazil: Couple of old dudes on this team too. The goalkeeper is awesome. Same guy who plays for Inter Milan. That should help. Oh, and Kaka, the Brazilian Messi. Although heard he's not in top form. During the 2006 World Cup, the fat Ronaldo was still playing, I mean, more walking around the pitch. And they lost to France in the second round or something. I think they may do better this time, otherwise they won't be let back into the country. FIFA Ranking: 1

Portugal: When Portugal play Brazil, it'll be similar to the England - USA match up. You know, the imperial tyrants against the wayward colonies. Cristiano Ronaldo plays for Portugal, which everybody knows as Nike dedicated almost half of their epic new ad to "Just call me cry&dive" Ronaldo. And he is not good-looking. In fact, I think he looks like a pimp. FIFA Ranking: 3

North Korea: ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Cute. Do they even have a FIFA ranking? (they do, its 105)

Ivory Coast: Apparently, Didier Drogba (he's friggin awesome btw) is going to play despite having broken his arm a week ago! How's that for dedication? As a fairly large number of star players from various nations are out due to injuries sustained during warm-up matchs, you'd think the trainers might give the bench a chance to play......no? FIFA Ranking: 27 (really? only?)

My picks:
Group F: Italy 1st, Slovakia 2nd
Group G: Brazil 1st, Ivory Coast 2nd

Pics of Didier Drogba and Fabio Cannavaro

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

James said

F: Italy
Paraguay

G: Brazil
Portugal

Tatiana Lensky said...

thank you James :*

fabian_Szymanek said...

I agree fully with James -

Group F:
Italy 1)
Paraguay 2)

Group G:
Brazil 1)
Portugal 2)

Anonymous said...

Wulfi says

Group F

1st bella Italia (what else?)
2nd Slovakia (fingers crossed)

Group B

the both portuguese speaking countries, though Cote d"Ivoire could kick aRs too ;-)

Yes, the communists - how did they get out of their country? A Kim-Excepition-Permission or did they just fled?